hey raya is juz arnd da corner yaw!!
tak sabar u noe.
and yes i noe.
da berzaman i never blogg.
keje la. very susah nk bukak comp ni huh..
so aniways,
lots and lots of things happened in this short one month..
well.
im getting to noe an better.
met him yest.
go geylang amek bju raya aku.
den we headed off to pasir ris.
member malu2 nk bbual.
but damn it he's so cute.
okok i noe.
its benn long tyme i never felt like this.
ouh! 17 yet so tall. tu muscle tuh hmmm.
haha..
so yea. i juz hoped that i can get to noe him more.
hmm..
later im going out to meet up with farhah, rah and hannah...
and maybe jah will cum along.
and yes.
in this bulan suci, everything is bck to normal.
alhamdulillah..
and home is cocking up.
evrything is done by me. god damn it having 2 guys in da house is such a waste.
tk guna langsong.
aku da mcm mighty bee.
super woman sak. bikin keje umah non-stop.
but fer my mum uh. aniting fer her.
siek pey ab n adek. hmph!
okok.
i'll blogg soon!!



kau.
beg blom beli.
kasot blom beli.
makeup pon.
rabak siek ni..

hmm. life goes on as usual.
sahur.. wake up at 12.
siap2..
gi keje.
dats all da routine..
well.
i dunno wad to do.
im in distress right now..
wad shud i do.
aku macam nk berhenti skola.
keje all da way uh.
but left few months aje.
bear with it la fafa.
insyallah after nitec, aku amek private diploma.
confem nyer ni.
well.
aku tau.
in life all i want is good life, family and frens.
but frm wad im seeing right now,
aku tkde arah tujuan.
hmm.


Ya ALLAh swt.
tolong la hamba mu ini.
ku merayu kepada mu..
tunjukkan lah aku jalan yang benar.
berikan lah aku ketabahan pada bulan Ramadhan ini...
Syawal pon nk tiba.
Let me thru all these challenges.

insyallah..
amin.

i realli missed every single thing..
let me off to another place where i can start anew.
coz all these things i hate revolves around me..

well..
i realli have no say in this kind of stuffs.
i want to ask or say.
but sumthing juz kept me holding all those werds.
i juz wished that everything juz goes as usual.
its not like she doesnt have any right??
its not that im holding back u. yes u c an haf all da freedom.
but i realli noe that u can noe da difference between good and bad.
like i said last tyme..
pandai2 la all of u bawa diri.

k.
so aniway,
i cant be with my gfs.
smue gi geylang..
hmm..
aku keje. mcm biase.
sha2(budak lama) n aisyah(budak baru) masok bcra.
and like everything cocked-up eh
naseb ade yus. ahha. buat kekek mepek2..
aniways yus send me mcm biase.
jah ajak lpak. so brought him along. ala dektu stakar sap rokok jer.
pantat pey tua.
haha naseb jah ade.
at last jah da nampak ni tua ni. haha.
mmg senang nk get along la. yus n his crap-ness.
da biase la kn.
aniways.
exam juz now mmg sumpah meraps eh!
ape yg aku blaja smue tk kua.
sot je tau.
ishk!!

k la.
bsok exam nms.
nanti bley blaja.
i wanna sleep.
later werk!
bye.

firstly. woke up freakking early today.
went to skul.
do da project cpg. da nk abes. skali nurul dari admiralty otw home..
patah balek skola. hmm.. gosh u realli semangat uh. lagi2 nga puase tuh.
so yea.
bikin keje lincah2 den headed to werk.
check2 gaji da masok. haha. best seey..
bought ciggies. haha. dgr2 aku sakit. but maseh nk merokok ni.
haha.
pathethic kn. well.
so yea.
went to werk.
laugh my ass off today.
cvoz gt yus and jason da two shitt guys.
ahha. crite mepek2 la.
pasal motor ngan ikan la. pasal kereta ngan drift skidded la.
mepek2 uh.
haha. den as per normal..
yus anta balek..
hehe suka kn fafa. haha.
lpak jap ngan dia kt bawah blok umah aku. we were early la.
sampai kol 11:18. slalunyer kol 11:30 aru smp.
den nga best2 tgk drg racing.. a video inside hp yus.
skali mak aku aru alek.
mangkok sia aku.
but i wasnt takot or wad la. coz me n yus bukan nye matair kn. kwn rapat je.
aha. aku lak nga sap rokok. sempat tau buang sblah. haa. yus salam mama.
den mak aku nampak helmet.. skali dia ckp eh2 kau naik motor.. baik2 tau..
da la dia start. haha. sempat yus buat gelak. haha. ekke siak.
omg i juz gotta noe dat yus ngan aku da senasib,
wad i mean is.
his father passed away when he was serving ns (18 yrs old i guess)
bcoz of penyakit cancer. at sgh! waah. noting to brag about.
but kite same naseb. waah. dat part aku teros mcm stunned skejap.
and he was too wen he noes mine was da same fate as his.
well. there is such ppl who go thru da same fate as me.
so yea. thanks to him. im not alone!!
hehe. i enjoyed every moment with him da mcm best fren la sey. haha.

kk back to da story.
as mama was talking.
skali mak aku ni ckp benda sampai aku ngan yus ter stoned jap.
"ni bila nk balek ni FATIMAH??"
damn! yus tgk aku abey nga tahan ketawe.
tunggu mak aku naik lift. abey dia ketawe rabak2.
pantat tol. haha.
yus tanye asl mak aku panggil aku fatimah. name pekat sia.
haha. aku pon kekek2 uh. isshh!!

haha. smoked awhile with him.. gave him one more cigg.
den took off. haha.
well. bsok ni amek gaji ni. mak oi! lau nampak dia paisey sia aku,


"aniways.
dlam byk2 lelaki yg aku kenal and rapat dgn.
cuma yus je la yg kes first hand bual face to face ngan mak aku.
and bcoz of that i feel awkward. idk why.."

yes i noe i have been bz with werk and all.
but its gonna pay off soon..
im quitting thy mac cafe. back to BCRA. so yea.
wondering y im back to BCRA? coz they wanna pay me 40 bucks already.
and besides they need ppl.. and they are like a family to me liao..
so aniways..
school have been mia. hha. actuali me la mia.
lagi nk masok exam lagi aku tk dtg..
so.. have not been providing mc... attendance have been dropping.
bt i HAVE been studying. INSYALLAH. i will pass.
kk. met up with the two badots yest. dua2 tk puase.
yg satu uzor la. yg satu isap rokok. but konon nye puase la tuh.
mak oi! sape ajar tuh. haha.
hehe.
sumthing happened last few days..
i end up being fetched home by yus. like omg!! (oh my gosh!)
like the third tyme riding his kr. haha. pantat sakit okey selit2 tempat dudok. i stil prefer sparkky.
hehe.
aniways we had this conversation on the way home last two nights..
(he bought along his two helmets when he asked me this.)

Yus: " Fa, kau ade helmet extra kat umah?"
Fafa: "Ader la. asal??"
Yus: "haa! kau ade? asal kau tk bwk. penat sey aku bwk dua helmet...."
Fafa:" -___________-" "kau bukan nk tanye aku smalam. tibe2 kau cakap 'Fa, bsok aku bawak helmet extra tok kau k..' yeye orr jer..."
Yus: "LOL" " kk takpe sok bwk jer helmet kau.."
da gituh tkpe..
anta aku balek tk tau jalan.
abey aku tukang bilang way mane nk jalan. abey sesat skejap.
haha. kekek uh yus. omg! asl la kau ade matair. SHIT! i didnt say that!
haha.
hmm.. very adorable guy. btol pey papan.

rony have been missing me. and yea. i missed u too shorty!
haha. si pendek ni.
i cant believe im falling fer a short guy.
yea basicly he's few cm shorter than me. but still..
haha.
i like him. very funny and weird.. but cute. i think ive seen him sumwher.
maybe ages ago at bukit batok. maybe la kn.
nama nye jugak budak bukit batok. haha.
da tk tau mane chai chee. haha.

k la.
im actuali ready to go to school. da siap smue.
skali got to noe that class start at 12. and bodohnye aku bgn kol 9. like perfectly early!!!
o_0!!
hmm.. mcm tk nk gi cpg pon ader. but ade project uh! siak uh. abey im werking later.
seems like im gonna be late again.
but im so not gonna bring my werk uniform and that helmet to sch!!
coz org pikir aku ni gile. bwk helmet tapi nk naik bus gi airport. hahahahah.
i wonder my gaji da masok ke blom eh..
hmm.. gaji mac cafe. lau da masok bley aku naik taxi! nk beli rokok lagik.
kesian baba, yus, jason.. mangsa rokok aku. haha. dun worry ppl.im gonna pay u bck aiyte..





ouh ya. i had this dream last night.
ppl in my dream: amirah, farhah, jah
we were walking sumwher like a pasar place.
when suddenly i said hey! we are at bukit batok already. tibe2 tau.
wad happen was. i began to search fer my long lost childhood fren.
skali wen we reached at this particular community centre.
i saw hanizah. omgosh! my long lost best fren! skali got to noe.
amirah was her social werker partner at that cc. haha lame kape mirah.
haha.
den i was like crying la. lama tk nampak kau smue. den we walked all da way to this shopping mall. (which actuali doesnt exists!)
told jah and farhah tiz da place where i used to go ect..
skali saw this group of guys. drg mcm kacau2 kite. first we hated them la.
like so typical guys to kacau2 org.
den jadi members. haha.
we end up at this macD.
we sat. when sudenly came this grp of ex-convicts.
two of them looked familiar.
and i actuali asked them hey krg frm dazhong pri eh dulu. haha.
to my surprised. yes they were.
cant recall da name. rudy.. and... sum name uh.. i forgot.
name kes tak penah dgr nye.
skali alarm bunyi. halamak! sot jer.